Lived Experience Forum

[BPDSurvivor]

Absolutely! When they said, ‘trauma’, I had to think, ‘What trauma?’ @_PixieSolstice_ 

It was certainly hard to accept.

It took a long time to realise that the way I was raised affected my ability to regulate my emotions. I never used this against my family. It was not too point fingers and people, but more so that I could heal.

BPD recovery is absolutely possible!

[MissLil]

Hey @BPDSurvivor Reading this was so touching! The change that is needed to not only survive, but thrive in the world speaks to me on so many levels. It is something that I preach everyday and how important it is to not survive but really thrive and live every single day 😀

[BPDSurvivor]

Hi @MissLil ,

I’m so glad we can share that hope of thriving in life.

When I was acutely unwell, I never thought it was possible. But now, Im a living witness of the power of hope and resilience.

My life today is so full and rewarding.

I go back to work next week. Having some routine back in my life is a good idea. However, I have enjoyed the holidays. It’s been good just to not be running around so much.

 I’ve still got a lot of preparations before Monday, but that’s okay. That’s life.

I look forward to hearing how everyone is going in their BPD-affected life @_PixieSolstice_ @Faith-and-Hope @NatureLover @Shaz51 @encee @Coffeelover82 

[saturnzoon]

I'm really sorry I missed this event cause it would have been perfect get great information, but I only came back to Sane a week ago.

I  am reading all the posts so that I can catch up and learn some strategies or things that I haven't tried yet, I've had BPD for about 30yrs now but was not picked up back then, specialist and doctors did not believe in it so it's really good it's recognised now.

 I'd like to thank @BPDSurvivor @MissLil @_PixieSolstice_ @Faith-and-Hope @NatureLover 

@Shaz51 @encee @Coffeelover82 and anyone else on here, sorry can't remember all the names for some good ideas

[tyme]

Great to have you @saturnzoon . 

BPD is pretty awesome once you understand it. I feel like it was about working out and practising how to think in more helpful ways that was the most helpful for me. 

Feel free to send through any questions you have. I'm happy to answer and I'm sure @BPDSurvivor too. 🙂

[BPDSurvivor]

Hi everyone @saturnzoon @MissLil @_PixieSolstice_ @Faith-and-Hope ,

I’m interested to hear how the extraordinary life of a borderline is going.

With me, life is full. As I think about it, I don’t know if I miss the ups and downs or not! Such a strange feeling not to have downs after experiencing them for 20 years or so.

I feel I’m on constant overdrive. There’s so much I want to accomplish in life and so little time to do it! 

I think I need to seriously sit down and think of some clear lifetime goals.

Im interested to hear what’s happening with everyone.

Hi @BlueBay ! Long time no see!

[BlueBay]

hi @BPDSurvivor 

i am about to start a shorter course of dbt at local hospital.  i tried to do the full course again but it was too hard because VOCAT wouldn't pay for the single sessions.  And they wouldn't pay for my taxi service to the City which I understand - it would have been too expensive.

so with the help of my own psych who has trained in DBT will help me along the way.

some days i lose sight of who i am; what do i want; why am i like this? 

trying different meds now to see if it stabilise my mood.

sometimes i feel like theres no hope

feeling abandoned by the ones who are not meant to abandon you - have

it doesn't matter now, i have to live my life without them

but - its damn hard

[BPDSurvivor]

I hear what you are saying @BlueBay . It sounds so hard and yet it’s something I think we all have to do.

in my recovery, I had to learn that I couldn’t rely on others nor blame others. Yes, shit happened, but I needed to learn to live on my own. I owed it to myself. I didn’t want to live in the shadow of others anymore. I had to learn to direct my life according to how I wanted it and not according to some of the horrors of my past. 

you’re right @BlueBay , it’s so damn hard . As an adult, I was the author of my own story. I couldn’t continue to let others dictate how my story was to end.

today, I am proudly say that I am in control of my life. Yes, I can’t control what’s going on around me or what people say or do, but I can choose to walk away and be the bigger person - and I have.

all the best with your DBT course. Embrace it. Practice it. Learn from it. What you get out of it no one can take away.

[BPDSurvivor]

Hi everyone,

How are you all going? @BlueBay @saturnzoon @MissLil @_PixieSolstice_ @tyme 

I’m working through so life stressors at the moment. Nothing big… just the cumulative stress that builds up.

Im concerned about my health and the side effects of medications causing me to put on weight. I know a lot of it is lifestyle changes, but I don’t feel I have the energy or will to make these changes. 

Thoughts?

[SkiptheDog]

Hi everyone,

It feels so good to have a community. One of my biggest struggles with BPD is always feeling isolated and empty, like I just don't "fit in" anywhere. 

Reading everyone's posts has really brought about a feeling of connectedness to people. As horrible as the struggle can be, and I would not wish it on anyone, I can say that our experiences certainly make us stronger. If I can help 1 other person through this journey then it will be worth it.

I am still early in my recovery journey, my diagnosis has actually made me feel a sense of relief as now I can be a little more easier on myself when I act out instead of feeling such shame and guilt.

While most people will have a 'logical brain' and 'emotional brain', with BPD they are so far removed from each other that it can feel impossible for them to work together. I am still learning how to read the signs and identify my triggers... What I find helps is to vocalize when I am feeling a bit overwhelmed, for eg. when my partner and I begin to disagree on something, instead of me going from 0-100 in 2 seconds, I will stop and let him know I am getting overwhelmed, please give me a few minutes before we continue discussing.

Having a supportive partner who understands, has been a blessing.... I would not be here if it weren't for him. 

Thank you everyone for sharing!