Ask Anything Monday: Have a question you feel too apprehensive to ask?

[Shaz51]

Hello, welcome to the forum

My Husband Who has Mental illness  can be very negative and it is wearing and hard to deal with.

My best plan is to try and get outside - get gardening or Do something , make a cup of tea , go for a walk in the garden , whatever, as I find it helps to raise his positivity as I am not listening and giving in to his negativity

It has taken time to do this , you need to look after yourself to be able to look after your mum , try not to take anything to heart because they don`t mean what they say

I find if I am calm and relaxed, my husband is also relaxed

[Faith-and-Hope]

Hi @Shaz51 😏

Sounds like we're all working to a few themes, aren't we ... ?

Providing distraction.

Staying calm.

Trying to take the negatives with a pinch of salt and not giving them too much attention.

Looking after ourselves to keep the negativity from rubbing off on us.

Have I missed anything ?

🌷💕

[Shaz51]

Hello @Maple, @meegs 

Hi @Faith-and-Hope, Totally true my friend

Having Patience

Flexible planning -- is there things that your mum enjoys , to have her interested in something ( my mum loves jigsaw puzzles and crossword puzzles -- things that can help to keep the negativity at bay for a little while

caring ,

watching movies on dvds that she loves together

[Jen12]

With schizophrenia do they ever get better and think normally or even with meds do they still have problems forever and need to reduce work and be careful of admission
Sister on meds finally but can't have normal conversation ever with her

[Jo]

The answers already offered are all great. One thing that I feel is really important when you're in close contact with your mother when she is being difficult or negative or frustrating is to clearly remind yourself that this is NOT your mother talking or behaving, it is her illness. Sometimes, when a loved one becomes ill mentally, it's as if they have disappeared and a complete stranger has taken their place. It is heartbreaking. But if you can keep reminding yourself that it is not your Mum speaking, it's the illness, it may help you to emotionally detach just a little, like a protective mechanism, yet stil be able to care for her.

[Faith-and-Hope]

Yep. Recognised that point in our situation ... it's a matter of the realtionships surviving in a dormant state while you wait for better outcomes.

🌷

[JennyK]

     Hi,
    
    My daughter has come home to live, after going from place to place for a

 
    long time. she has been taking her medication now for a week, but is 
    still very lethargic & at times difficult. I have joined a support 
    group, will have to be patient, I find it difficult at times to 
    understand. the illness deression & anxiety has been with her for a 

    while. Just need some feedback & support, good to chat to people 
    experiencing the same. I want her to be in a loving supportive envirnment.
    
    
    Cheers Jenny K
    

[Faith-and-Hope]

Great that you're reaching out for moral support @JennyK .....

I will tag you from our virtual coffee shop ... come and make some friends here where you can chat a bit anytime ....

We can all relate to what you're going through ....

🌷 F&H

[JennyK]

Thanks Faith-and Hope - got through the day, have had trouble navigating the site. Think I'm back on track JennyK

[Faith-and-Hope]

Good to hear @JennyK .... 😊

Having a steady sort of day today in terms of family commitments which is nice ..... hubby away so workload drops a lot and I can catch my breath a bit ....

💜🌷