LIVE CHAT: BPD for Friends, Family and Carers - This Sunday 3rd October 7:00-8:30pm AEDT

[BPDSurvivor]

@ShiningStar ,

Actually, BPD is a highly misunderstood diagnosis. Many practitioners deem it 'untreatable'. Often, it is because it requires psychotherapies as opposed to some of the more conventional therapies which involve medication.

BPDSurvivor

[BPDSurvivor]

Now, to discuss some of the things that have worked for me as someone with BPD (NB when I use the word 'we', I am referring to someone with BPD).

1. Set clear boundaries

Seems harsh sometimes, especially if you have to tell a borderline to stop contacting you after midnight, but boundaries help us feel safe. Of course I’m not speaking in terms of crises and emergencies.

Boundaries are also there to keep you, as carers and loved ones, safe and well. For example, sometimes, there needs to be a boundary set surrounding self-harm. That is, if SH requires medical attention, then medical attention will be sought (regardless of the kicking and screaming).

2. Communicate clearly

Sometimes, we don’t communicate very well. We just can’t get the thoughts or words out. Help us by modelling clear communication. Shows us and tell us you cannot read our minds.

3. Do what you say and say what you do.

PLEASE keep your word. I know this is difficult sometimes, especially if we are not good at keeping our word. Please understand that our world is absolutely chaotic. If you keep you word, it helps us build trust and gives us reassurance.

4. Strike while the iron is COLD

Have you ever tried reasoning with a pwBPD when they are emotionally triggered? Did you get very far? Most likely – NO. When we are emotionally heightened, our reasoning and rational brain ceases to exist. Instead, at this time, you may simply need to walk away, but don’t forget you will be returning to check-in with them at whatever time. Give them a time please e.g. in 30 minutes. This helps reassure us that you are not leaving us.

Question 2

There are many other things I can add. But instead, let’s hear from you. What have you found to work for someone with BPD?

[Shaz51]

Hello @BPDSurvivor , @ShiningStar 

Yes it is 6.15 pm here 

But all ok 

Very interested in learning more  and helping one of our customers who has BPD family members 

@Determined 

[BPDSurvivor]

Welcome @Shaz51 !

Sorry for the mix up - I hope you find this segment somewhat helpful. Others can always read through this thread at a time convenient for them.

There are so many myths surrounding BPD, so hopefully we can iron out some of them tonight and answer any questions which may arise.

[BlueBay]

Is this just for carers of someone with BPD. I know you tagged me @BPDSurvivor  but the questions are relating to a carer?

I'm not sure???? 

[BPDSurvivor]

No @BlueBay . It's open for anyone, including you! 

Perhaps you can help dispel some of the myths so that people will learn to understand us a bit better! 

In terms of everyday interactions, what are some of the things you have found which work for you?

[ShiningStar]

 Hi @BPDSurvivor 

Thank you so much 

That’s such a great question 

Unfortunately, in my experience, one of the issues that really stood out for me was the degree of stereotyping that appeared to be attributed to those who were living with Borderline Personality Disorder 

Take care,

ShiningStar 

[Meowmy]

@TAB hey tabby, this may be 8nteresting for you.

[BlueBay]

Ok @BPDSurvivor  hi everyone I have BPD. 
My emotions are everywhere from calm one minute to an angry overwhelmed emotional person the next. 
my boundaries between my doctor and psych are very clear and set. So I can't cross that boundary. I have many times before crossed the boundaries with numerous emails over the time eith my previous psychologist. 
rejection and abandoned are very hard for me to understand. I syruggke with those quite a lot. 

[Shaz51]

Hello @BlueBay , @ShiningStar , @BPDSurvivor 

Hello @BPDSurvivor 

I have a question to ask , is there any evidence that BPD gets worse with each pregnancy??