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Welcome & getting started

SunnyRays
Contributor

Hi people!

Hi guys,

I am new here. I was too lonely and decided to look for a place to connect and here i am. It's been years that i been single and this lockdown made it harder to get back to relationship matter. I been feeling down and losing track of day and night. Sometime it's just so hard to deal with myself, spending time alone become harder and harder every second passes. I remember feeling that the lonely winter nights were seem will never be over. Today is sunny and bright in the Melbourne city and i went out to the park but the feeling inside is still the same. Sometime feel like it's just too much. Just living and breathing feel like a misery. Movies, tv shows and games just don't satisfied me anymore. Everything seem so pointless yet the time is moving on but i can't keep up. I don't know what i want or what i need anymore. I don't know what i should expect from this forum but not sure what will suprise me. I would love some raw excitment and happiness. I wonder what is it like to feel alive and hopeful. Have i really felt that before? I can't remember the feeling. 

31 REPLIES 31

Re: Hi people!

Hi @SunnyRays ,

 

Welcome to the forums!

 

Its great you've reached out, particularly at this time when there's probably a sense of overwhelming isolation.

 

I live on my own and lockdowns have been incredibly difficult. Working from home for 6 lockdowns really takes its toll. 

 

 I've used these forums to stay connected. To help with the isolation, I ensure I go for walks each day and day hi to the people I see.

 

In terms of relationships, I've sort of put it on hold. I know time is ticking, but I also know that if it is for me, it'll come. If not, so be it. 

Do you have any special interests so that I can direct you to some threads on the forums?

 

 Looking forward to hearing from you,

BPDSurvivor

 

Re: Hi people!

Hi Survivor,

Thanks for taking the time to reply. Appreciated. 

I am trying to go out for a walk daily but don't have the courage to say hi to random people. Wouldn't mind to hello back if someone start hi me first tho. 

I used to enjoy doing photography stuffs but now it feel like a burden just to carry my camera not to mention taking it and processing later. 

I have been playing online games but i grew tired of it too. 

I just don't feel excitments over what the future holds anymore.

chibam
Senior Contributor

Re: Hi people!

Hi @SunnyRays .Smiley Happy Welcome to the forums!

 

I'm sure you'll find this place to be a friendly, supportive atmosphere.

 

I can relate to an awful lot of what you say in your intro. Loneliness is a major problem for a great many people. Sometimes, I am able to take a little comfort in the fact that at least now, there are high-level discussions being conducted with the government about dealing with this loneliness epidemic. Maybe solutions will be forthcoming? We can only hope. Smiley Indifferent

 


@SunnyRays wrote:

I don't know what i want or what i need anymore.


I hear this a fair bit.

 

I think when people & life have been beating us down for a long time, it sort of beats our dreams out of us, you know? It distorts our vision of the world and our aspirations for the future.

 

Would it help to imagine what you might wish for if you found "the genie in the bottle"? If you were given three wishes that could be absolutely anything you wanted, no matter how far-fetched?

 

I'm obviously not suggesting that you might one day stumble upon a magic bottle that will solve all your problems. But it might be useful as an exercise to help you clarify what you want out of life.

 

Best Wishes Smiley Happy

Re: Hi people!

Hi @SunnyRays
Nice to meet you.
I feel similar about lockdown. I am actually bit concerned about what life will be like when it all goes back. I am worried I have forgotten how to be social. How to interact with people in real life.
It'll be weird.

But its hard now too right?

You've made a good choice joing up here.

Tonight we have the Friday feast - just a place to chill out on Friday night.

I can tag you over on it now and when it starts you'll be notified.

Though I acknowledge it may be abit overwhelming to be on that

Take care of you and please don't hesitate to chat on here
Former-Member
Not applicable

Re: Hi people!

Hello @SunnyRays 

 

As a fellow Melbournian , l know that connecting with people is hard at the best of times and Covid has just taken it all away. 

I was once told "Your best Relationship needs to start with yourself before we let others in " , if only l followed that saying LOL NOT....

So while in lockdown , l too have watched a whole lot of Stan , Prime and Disney +. But l get bored with too much movies out there.

Jigsaw puzzles were bought but not opened yet , um thought l would learn Guitar , then l bought a Violin and Keyboard. Well l need a dummies book on all 3 instruments actually , but the thought was there, possibly ??? 

So l thought indoor exercise might help with  exersice bike , weights and huge yoga ball , 40mins 3 times a week is where l am with that. 

So l got onto Word with Friends and my photo has really OLD overseas males really wanting to be my FRIEND , UMM NOPE.

I was going to say Smile . but l forget the masks we have to wear outsides , but u can draw a smile and write l am smiling , but it may be weird ..  But def a conversation opener ????

I too have recently joined here for advise and connecting with those who understand me the most without judgement and shame .

with my good and bad days when l am really alone and want to be heard and to know maybe someone can care or think am worth it.

Nice to meet you SunnyRays and Hello !!

Smiley Happy Heart

 

 

 

 

Re: Hi people!

Hi @chibam 

Thanks for your time. Appreciated.

I took sometime to think about what i would wish for. But i couldn't come up with a definate answer. I guess a prupose would be one. Sometime it seem like existing seem pointless. What's the purpose? People come and go. New becomes old. 

A swedish dj Avicii used to sing "If life is a game then love is the prize". 

May be feeling Love would be another wish too. Sounds pathetic when i typing it out loud 😂. But i believe it's ok to open up abit here. Tired of imagining what is it like to have a significant person in my life. Will i ever get to experience it again? But i I don't feel hopeful as of now. 

Re: Hi people!

Hi @Former-Member 

Nice to meet you my fellow Melbounian,

It's a tough time indeed. I saw a post on social media stating Melbourne is officially the city with the longest lockdown in the world because of covid. I don't know if it's a good thing or a bad thing. But definately not a good thing for me. May be good for overall population to control the spread of virus. I don't know anymore. Anyway, good to know you are able to do those stuffs by yourself. Good for you. Smiley Happy i used to enjoy doing calisthenise. But I am yet to find the strength to get back to it. Anyway, keep it up. I hope everything going well for you. 

Re: Hi people!


@SunnyRays wrote:

Hi @chibam 

A swedish dj Avicii used to sing "If life is a game then love is the prize". 

May be feeling Love would be another wish too. Sounds pathetic when i typing it out loud 😂.


Oh, no need to feel silly. That is way more common then you probably realize. Especially around places like this.

 

So it sounds like you do know what you'd wish for from the genie, after all: Someone to love (as Freddie Mercury might say Smiley Wink) That's always been my #1 wish, as well. Like, I can describe my perfect woman down to a tea, and if I only had a magical genie to turn my blueprint into a flesh-and-blood reality, I'd be home free.

 

In more realistic terms, if there was a service you could just sit down and describe your ideal partner to, and they would scour the population to find the best available match to set you up with, that would be amazing, wouldn't it?

 

As for purpose... Well, I think I can understand, and relate to your dillemma quite well. The world's changing so fiercely that nothing seems to make sense anymore, isn't it?

 

I had a purpose that I devoted myself to completely when I started out. I was going to do a lot of good, and give a lot of people incentive to life. Now, times have changed, values have changed, aspirations have changed, and the world doesn't seem to have any want of people like me.

 

We're a society dominated by mindless survivors. But I don't understand survivors.

 

This is just my opinion, but I think that a key part of knowing your purpose is to know what you want the rest of society to be for you. What do you want to see when you watch other humans? When you know that, you'll know what you want to be for others.

 

There are more complications to follow, but I think that's an essential first step.

Re: Hi people!

@SunnyRays ,

 

It's true, we have been in lockdown for so long. I know I can't change the lockdown so I just make the most of it.

 

 I'm using this time to do things i normally don't get time to do such as go to the park during the day, cook for neighbours, say hello to neighbours, complete uni, study things I am interested in, read, join online health classes (fitness and mindfulness). 

If it weren't for Covid, I wouldn't been doing these things.

 

Yes, I wish we weren't in lockdown, but we'll we are, I look for a way to accept it with all its advantages.

 

Loneliness is an issue. I reach out to others as much as I can including here on SANE. It definitely helps.

 

BPDSurvivor

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