- Author : Faith-and-Hope
- support : 2
- Topic : What's new: services, research, technologies
Hi @Appleblossom .... 😊💕
My mum gave me a copy of "I'm Okay, You're Okay" in my early teens ..... I guess trying to help safe-guard me through boarding school years .... that was my intro to id, ego etc .... the concept of an inner child, your parents' voice in your ears, and your own developing adult status.
I am not familiar with schema therapy, but will look it up to gain a general understanding, thanks .....
What I am relating to about IFS is also the fact that our sub-personalities can have a positive effect under some circumstances, and a negative effect - that needs considering in terms of how and why - under other circumstances.
This fits with them not actually being "good" or "bad" .... just well-guided, or mis-guided and needing to be adjusted accordingly. I know that is a very simplistic take on it, but gives the general perspective,
In looking at DID .... and I am wondering whether some of the sub-personalities become isolated as "exiled" alters, perhaps not by themselves, but as a sub-group .... and sh in particular.
Because alters sometimes speak up very directly in therapy sessions they can explain quite succinctly that they are the particular alter with sh motives, and exactly why that is ..... often because they have become a self-appointed guardian of the body corporate, and in their limited individual and isolated capacity, they have decided that they have the best solution to "safe-guarding" the internal community from further harm, by harming themselves ... That alter has decided to be "the fall guy", the one that everybody can blame and hate, so the rest of the alters don't have to suffer those feelings, despite that fact that they are all suffering from the sh ....
With therapy that alter can be addressed as an "individual" .... led to understand that their thinking is based in self-compassion, although it is mis-directed, and "schooled" to understand that their are better ways to deal with the pain debt without such extreme measures. Again, addressing the feelings of the alter (and the particular sub-personalities isolated with them?) can provide the validation they are looking for, and disarm the behaviour pattern.
If this can be done in work with alters in someone challenged with DID .... I expect the same principles can be applied in dealing with sub-personalities who have taken control of the inner family out of a mis-guided belief that they have to protect the inner family, with only partial authority to do so, and partial perspective ..... especially if that sub-personality is one developed in early childhood or adolescence, they need the guidance of more mature sub-personalities to temper their thought and behaviour choices, without leaving them feeling invalidated.
The whole person needs to feel self-compassion. Injured sub-personalities need attention and care. While the sorting out of it all requires the steady hand and experience of professional therapists, as carers and as those being cared for, I think an understanding of these inner workings and an apprecitation for the strengths of our sub-personalities can help take away the feeling that it is all random and uncontrollable ....
I think it provides and enables hope.