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outlander
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it just doesnt stop

im constantly worrying, i dont even know what im worrying about but my brain is making it so hard to know what is real and what isnt. i have tried so many things to make it stop even for a little while  both healthy and unhealthy and it just doesnt!!!

i can barely concentrate on my studies now,  i try crochetting and no matter how hard i concentrate on that pattern, i can still hear that chatter. sometimes i dont even know what that 'chatter' is saying, its just this constant noise! 

 

does anyone have any advice? i feel like im going crazy 

18 REPLIES 18

Re: it just doesnt stop

@outlander I can’t remember if you are on medication. The last medication I was on I liked more because my brain felt more alert but it also sped up the worry thoughts and put them on loops. The meds im on now slow my brain down (maybe too much) but I have relief from some of that cyclic noise and panicky worry. Just a thought. 

Re: it just doesnt stop

Hi@Teej
im on medications atm, i had asked a few weeks ago if i was able to increase the one that still had room to be increased but they said they didnt think it was neccessary and i havent been able to get back into see them again yet.

I have prn medications ive been using and on some occasions doubled it but it doesnt do anything either so its pretty pointless taking them.
what youve said ' worry thoughts on a look, cyclic noise and panicky worry' is exactly it and i cant find any relief at all. im not really sure what else to do..

Re: it just doesnt stop

I think it’s worth talking about meds again @outlander. I know it’s not the cure but it might help. It sometimes take lots of time to change these things. I’m more aware now and I think therefore more accepting but it’s taking sooooo long to get out of destructive thinking patterns. This week I’ve had lots of si at night. I have to keep telling myself that it is my brain stuck playing this track. Some nights are easier and some I have to strap myself in for lots of distraction to not get hooked into them. I think worry works the same way. Sometimes we can be calm and accepting of it but sometimes it still owns us. I’m learning it’s all just a work in progress. Unfortunately on here you often see when it owns me more than when I’m working through it 🤦‍♀️

Re: it just doesnt stop

ok @Teej ill call in the morning and see when my gp is avaliable next to talk to her again.
it always worries me becasue they either dont care or they opt for hospital and i cant go there.

its so frustrating isnt it 😞 Our brains need to find a new track to play instead of constant worries. I thought i had it under control but i think its been gradually building up more than i realised and its hit hard more so the past few days. Its at the point where i just cannot breathe, even when im sitting im still short on air.

can i ask what sorts of distractions work for you?

i really dont like asking for help if i can manage it on my own either, even now im not really wanting to ask but im worried itll get out of hand if i dont/

Re: it just doesnt stop

@outlander Hi outlander I find getting out of the house and going for a walk or any kind of gentle exercise really helps, even around the block does me wonders when my head is full of noise.

 

I didn't know you hear voices? Does your pdoc know? are you being treated for it? 

Re: it just doesnt stop

Good evening @Teej and @outlander

I have been very anxious lately. Some things that help are meditation, better diet, and limiting sugar. Avoiding alcohol also helps. So no more for me today. In fact i have had a lot this week. Not helping. Sometimes i still deal with si but i find that the best way to counteract it is to distract or sometimes ignore. It can be hard.

Right now i feel lonely. Even though i am here with my sister and folks are arriving soon. Is it okay if i jump on here too as well as friday feast?

Re: it just doesnt stop

How we navigate these moments @outlander is always hard.
Remember you are not alone in that my friend. Ive had nagging voices and sad visualisations lately. Of just being a lonesome loser. I was crying about this morning. I think sometimes we have to be our best friend to oull ourselves out of these moments

Re: it just doesnt stop

My distractions are a bit boring @outlander but they work mostly for me. Sometimes not but these days they do more often. First distraction if I’m distressed but not too far gone is to do a jigsaw puzzle on my iPad. I’m up to doing 625 piece puzzles that average around two hours to complete. If I get into 'flow' doing these my distress levels dramatically reduce. I get caught in the puzzle and other thoughts get blocked out. Second one I sometimes do is look through Facebook for feel good things or surf YouTube. Sometimes I’ll look for a TED talk to inspire me and get my thoughts into a more positive frame. My last resort one is to play a repetitive shortish game that I don’t have to think to much about but my brain gets that feel good hit. It’s games like mahjong or free cell for me but it’s anything that takes some concentration but not too much but that I can play until I get it out and get the feel good hit. They are not necessarily good because there is an addiction level as well but it’s better than previous strategies (and occasionally now still sometimes unhealthy coping strategies). They are being used much less frequently now and replaced by the ones I mentioned above. 

 

When none one of the above work this year I’ve called mental health triage or get help to go to hospital ( I think the latter’s happened once). 

 

This is what hat works for me but I know others would find that impossible. When distress hits me in a big way I get physically flattened. I don’t get agitated like others but the bigger the distress the more knocked down I get where I feel paralysed sometimes and struggle to even roll over in bed. I think that is why these things work for me. I can do them in bed when I’m flattened. 

 

I hope this helps. 💜🤗

Re: it just doesnt stop

hello @greenpea

perhaps my voices and your voices are a little different from what i know of you. Mine i guess more the inner critic and brain causing chaos rather than different distinctive voices being there.
My psychiatrist did know about my storng negative thoughts, sh, SI etc but i no longer see her anymore. havent done for a while now as she doesnt think its neccessary for me to see her anymore.
i havent been walking that much lately but ive been on the exercise quite alot, usually morning and night and sometimes in the day depending on how im feeling. i think its helping to an extent with the nervous energy too.


@Teej they dont sound boring to me. i do puzzles and mahjong too. thats usually my go to of a nght besides the forums and music. I either shut down as you do i get so jittery i just cant stay still, possibly because my entire life im forever doing something., anything instead of having time to just sit. maybe some of the distress atm is coming from whats to come. I have a headspace appt in another week or so but after that i dont have a psych until i can renew he care plan in feb/march (cant exactly remember) but i dont even know what to talk about in that session either.


@Flying_Hams yes i can relate to quite alot of what you said too. i rarely drink so thats not really something that concerns me. the rest im already doing except meditation cause i really really dont like it at all.

lonley in a room full of people is something i encounter all the time. i dont fit in with anyone lately so i guess its a matter of learning to be my own best friend.

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