Lived Experience Forum

[LJE]

Hi @Owlunar,

Thank you for this kind and empathetic response! I'm sorry that you had to go through the pain and anxiety of miscarriage and being told it was unlikely you'd ever conceive naturally. It seems so unfair sometimes but the bright side of your story proves that things that are supposed to happen actually will. Despite the struggles, you raised an amazing human that you made.

I think what you say is very true... This pregnancy has been sent to teach me (classic Type A control freak *wink*) that some things are out of my control. That it's ok to let go because when I'm a parent, outside of the necessary discipline and love, that little being will be its own entity. Its own free-thinking, decision-making little person. And I can't spend the rest of my life with my heart in my throat!

I'm trying to hold on to the good things today. E.g. My mother-in-law's birthday falls on 12 weeks 6 days so for her, that will be the most incredible birthday present! And the thought of having a one month old bub at Christmas 😍

Small goals: Get to the 7 week scan this time next week. See a heartbeat. Believe that I'm as worthy of having a child as everyone else...

Much love and all the best to you also xx

[LJE]

Hi again everyone! Just wanted you to know that I did what was discussed yesterday with the cards. See below image. It's at the foot of the bed and the first thing I see when I wake up 😊 ... your advice yesterday was invaluable. Much love xx

@Owlunar @CheerBear @Teej @Razzle @Tortoiseshell 

[Owlunar]

Hi @LJE 

Thanks for your kind comments - it is all a long time ago for me but I still remember how much out of control my life was when I found out I was pregnant and everything was up in the air

We don't have any control over what happens so yes - we have to give that to whatever power we believe in and I did pray a lot during that time. I can understand your uncertainty well - I am wondering about your cards - that will be an interesting way to deal with things - I can't see your picture yet.

And little people are free-thinking, independent and assertive beings - life is never dull and will never be the same once your child makes it through this time and comes into your life

I wish you the best

Dec

[LJE]

Thanks @Owlunar - not sure if the image is waiting to be approved or if it's too big but I'll try posting it again here but smaller 🙂

[Owlunar]

Hi @LJE 

Your cards are up and they are great - what a good way to start the day

And you may never go through this again so yes - make the most of it - it's early yet but soon you will be able to feel it from the outside and see the little knees and elbows - and your mother-in-law can enjoy this too

I'm an older person now and I can tell you that I enjoy hearing about people having babies - I can coo and ah over other people's and be clucky because there is nothing I can do about it

Thanks for posting and sharing your cards - that's a great idea

Dec

[Razzle]

@LJE   That's awesome !!  I can feel the change through your post already, I'm so happy for you - and excited.  Sounds like you are giving yourself permission to enjoy this - as you should ❤️❤️

[LJE]

So far, so good @Razzle ... today is a touch better than yesterday and at this point, day by day is how I intend to manage things ❤

[CheerBear]

Good morning @LJE and everyone here. Your cards are SO fabulous! Big time go you for putting them together 🎉🙂

Interested in hearing how you're going today if you feel up to sharing. Hope the cards have given you a good start to your day. Less than a week until your appointment now!

[LJE]

Hi @CheerBear ... Thank you! The cards had quite the task on their hands this morning because I woke 2 hours ago after a dream (read: nightmare) in which my fertility doctor scanned me and there was no heartbeat and followed up by asking me which tiles he should choose for his spare rooms at his house. I'm still shaking internally. It seemed so vivid and real. What on earth?? 

[CheerBear]

Oh @LJE that would have been horrible 🙁 Nightmares suck, especially vivid and real kind of ones. Were you able to calm yourself enough to get some more sleep? Are nightmares something new for you (sorry if you've mentioned that before)?