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rye
Contributor

Any support or advice appreciated

Hi there.

 

I'm hoping I might be able to find some listening ears here.

 

I had an appointment with my old GP this morning to get a mental health care plan done. He has done a couple for me in the past, but it's been a solid 5 or so years since I have seen this doctor.

 

I was super nervous because these things just aren't all that fun, but it was so much worse than I was expecting, and I've been feeling pretty out of sorts all day. He barely said a word to me the whole time I sat there, asked some of the awful questions with a total lack of compassion, and seemed to have completely forgotten my prior history and diagnoses. I felt really ashamed, and like I was totally wasting his time. And at the same time, really unheard - he actually guessed the answers to most of the questions, and as a result the plan he gave me a copy of is full of errors and assumptions. I almost hoped he would ask these questions so I could open up about a few things bothering me right now (mainly unresolved eating issues), but as he didn't, I feel like there's now not a single person in the world that knows that this is still a problem for me. I know it needs to stop but my options for help here seem to have disappeared.

 

I know it's not a big deal, and I can always correct these things when I see a psychologist, but I just feel really dismissed and upset. I know that my MH problems are so minor compared with others, but this GP has been so good with me in the past, and now I am a nuisance to him.

Has anyone else had experiences like this? Any thoughts or ideas for how to avoid this kind of interaction in future? Or just general kind words of support so I don't feel so useless?

 

Thanks. x rye

7 REPLIES 7

Re: Any support or advice appreciated

@rye  I find GP’s aren’t usually very good with eating issues or mental health in general so you have to find one that specializes to get anywhere. I am sorry you are having such a hard time with this even with small problems people deserve help. I am not saying your issue is small but everyone deserves help no matter how big or small the issue is. 

Re: Any support or advice appreciated

Hi @rye 

 

Welcome to the forums and for reaching out for support. That can be a hard thing to do in a new environment so we are really glad you have. 

 

Like @Eden1919  mentioned here - I am also sorry that your experience with your GP was so negative. It can be so hard and really disempowering to have experiences like that. LIke you mentioned it is good that you can still set it straight with a pyschologist but the impact of a meeting with your GP like that can really be awful. 

 

Have you considered trying another GP? I know its the last thing we want to do sometimes, but there is such a vast array of proactitionors out there, some won't always understand certain things while others can be way more aware of mental health impacts and offer empathy. Have you reached out to pyschologist? Could be good to raise this experience with them for some more advice too. 

 

We have plenty of peers in this space that can empathise with this as well. I hope you enjoy connecting and getting support here. It can sometimes be nice to Introduce yourself here or pop into the Good Morning! thread to say hi to others. 

Re: Any support or advice appreciated

Continuity of care can be so hard to come by and having any medical professional who will not listen to how you are feeling with empathy, compassion, understanding and at the very least referring you to someone who is more qualified is a real kick in the teeth. I'm between GPs at the moment and although its trial and error it is really is worth persisting until you find someone who actually listens. This can make a huge difference to your mental health just by itself.

 

I know it can be stressful just meeting a new GP, and yet another if you don't feel he/she is listening, but it sounds as if this one is not worth persisting with. And most GPs can at least refer you to a mental health team or private psychologist etc which may be more beneficial. But often a trusted GP can be first port of call when you start feeling down and should be able to at least try helping you first before things get more serious.

Re: Any support or advice appreciated

Hi @rye , I would try another GP and see what happens.  It's a big deal to you. Large or small issues should be handled respectfully and more professionally than what you experienced.  

 

Hang in there.

Re: Any support or advice appreciated

Hi @rye you deserve better than how that gp treated you. It's hard enough to ask for help, let alone have someone in a helping profession be so invalidating. I'm sorry you had to go through that.

There are some really good gps out there. As others have said, it can take effort and persistance to find one but it's worth it. If you can get in to see a psychologist, they sometimes have recommendations regarding gps who understand mental health issues. May be worth asking.

There are lots of people here who are accepting and friendly and just get it when it comes to mental health.

Re: Any support or advice appreciated

Thanks everyone for reading, and your support.
@Eden1919, @Lauz, @DesertRat, @Gazza75 and @frog - I really appreciate you taking the time to reply and help me feel validated in how I was feeling.

I've been living overseas for a couple of years and have seen so many different GPs who just put me on medication, that I was like, right, I'll just come home to Aus and see my old GP who knows me and has always been really caring, and helped me through some horrible times.
So I'm really hoping that the other day he was either having a bad day, or was viewing the mental health plan as just a technicality he had to get through to get me to a psychologist.

All the same, you're right - it was really not okay to leave me feeling like that. I would be willing to give him another try if I needed immediate support, but definitely makes me feel a little more hesitant and a bit more alone.

Thankfully, I managed to get onto a psychologist who can see me next week. I'm hoping I can mention a bit of this to her, and hopefully be strong enough to disclose some of the more disordered behaviour I've been experiencing, so at least someone else knows, and I'm not in it by myself.

Again, thanks for your kind words and support. I'm a little lacking in people I'm willing to talk to openly at the moment, so it's great to be here and have some listening ears.

I hope everyone has a good day. x

Re: Any support or advice appreciated

Hello mates,

 

Just thought I'd leave an update:

 

I met with the new psychologist today. I have really good vibes about her - she seems really empathetic, and I was able to tell her everything hard and difficult and awful, and I feel a lot better for someone else knowing how I'm really feeling, rather than carrying it all myself.

 

Having said that, I'm having a bit of a hard time tonight. But I'm glad I have a place here to feel like I can come and help myself feel less alone. 

 

Thoughts are with anyone else struggling right now.

Much love, 

rye x

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