Best Friends Club

[ENKELI]

@Meowmy I'm so sorry your family is causing you grief. I've never understood why those who are supposed to love us the most treat us the worst.

I hope you can do something to make yourself feel better, whether it's watch a show you like, read a book, have a hot shower or bath, something for you. 

I have cut off a lot of my family too, it's really hard. Sending you big hugs and loves like you deserve.

[Meowmy]

@rav3n @Shaz51 hey friends, thank you so much for culpa and support.i think may be I stuck it out, I will feel better in the future.Grew up with controlling and dysfunctional family

 Never easy. My grandfather was good person in my childhood who taught me to be good friend to people. I have gone through so much over twenty five years to grow put of the trauma my parents put on me

Father died. Mother still around ,old,demanding and controlling

I grew stronger with each flare up episodes of severe depression

Just not relating to my family in old submissive ways anymore

[Meowmy]

@ENKELI thank you so much for support.My family is still in my.life. I am just not worried about how they feel anymore. I don't think walk out will qork. Guess just keep space for myself

[Shaz51]

Keeping space for yourself is a good idea @Meowmy 🥰

[rav3n]

@Meowmy i feel you with this. it takes up so much energy trying to advocate for yourself and sometimes our family's just not in the place to want to hear us out and make changes.

i'm glad you're starting to stand up for yourself, i know how hard it can be - so proud of you for this. 

one thing that helped me was realising that i know myself better than my parents will ever know me, and therefore their thoughts/words/actions towards me have little to no value compared to someone who genuinely knew and understood me. some parents don't have the emotional maturity we hope for, but the important thing is you do and you have the power to look after yourself better than them 💗

[ENKELI]

@Meowmy a lot of my family live 420km away from me so it's easy to cut them out. Like you though I have family who I am expected to socialise with and be nice to even though they don't reciprocate. My cousins' wife is nothing more than a gym bunny who looks down on me because I'm not skinny or as attractive as she thinks she is. My mum had her 80th birthday at her sisters' house and my cousins' wife was there of course. I was there with my brother and oldest friend who is considered family (I'll call her Jayne) and the 3 of us were sitting in the gazebo away from the elders. My 2 cousins came and joined us, we were chatting and laughing and then cousins' wife wandered down. She said "I thought I heard Jayne talking." I was confused for a moment until Jayne and I both realised cousins wife was referring to a different Jayne. When she saw it wasn't she turned and walked away, not even saying hello.

Mum keeps telling me to try harder to be friends with her but I have nothing in common with her aside from my cousin. And my aunt who I was always so close to thinks the sun shines out of her daughter in laws' butt. 

You are right to avoid as much as possible no matter what they might say. You are more important than their disfunction and if they can't see what a wonderful beautiful person you are then they are the ones missing out.

[Meowmy]

@rav3n thank you so much. Think this may be the key. To be able to look after myself better than my parents can. My parents placed so much trauma on me to have caused the MI.i am lucky to be alive. Hope I will continue to grow and learn

[Meowmy]

@ENKELI thank you so much for teddy and heart. Yes. Looks I need to grow stronger ha

[ENKELI]

@Katz42 hi there!

I'm with you, to be rid of the pain would be a super-power I'd embrace.

May your week be good, enjoy your walk tomorrow and your latte - you deserve it 😍

[ENKELI]

@Meowmy I think we could all learn to grow stronger. And we will. You will look back and be proud of how far you've come, of this I have no doubt.

I sometimes wish I was more like my brother, he is unfazed by what people think of him which is funny because everyone he works with think so highly of him. One of the younger women he works with said he was like the big brother she never had. He has a small group of very loyal friends and he is just as loyal to them as he is to me.

There are days I want to strangle him, but he is always there for me no matter what.