Lived Experience Forum

[cloudcore]

This fortnight we will discussing our third emotion, sadness.

Previously we have discussed the emotions of anger and fear, and looked at how these emotions have shown up for us, how they feel physically in our body and how we manage them. This fortnight we will be doing the same for the blue section of the wheel.

Sadness is an emotion that we have all felt, and it is essential to our survival. From our time as a child, sadness is there to communicate our distress. As adults, sadness works to let us know that we need to grieve after being hurt and to seek out those who love and support us.

While other “negative emotions,” like fear and anger seem to prepare us for flight, fight, or avoidance, etc - the benefits of sadness can be harder to understand. Sadness is a signal for help or comfort, and can motivate or prompt us to overcome challenges and make choices that improve our life.

Feeling sadness

Sadness is often a result of another feeling, such as anger, stress, anxiety or hopelessness. Sometimes, the other feeling may be so strong that you don’t realise you are sad.

When we think about sadness, ways we might describe it include “I feel depressed”, “I feel hurt”, “I am lonely”, “I feel guilty”, and “I feel broken hearted”. It is important to note, however, that experiencing sadness is different to having depression. Sadness, like other emotions, is temporary and fades away with time.

When we can identify how sadness shows up for us, and some of the signs we might be experiencing sadness, we can take steps to manage the emotion and seek out support that may be helpful for us.

This discussion will talk about themes such as sadness and grief, and topics that could be upsetting or triggering for those reading along. There are questions we have planned ahead of time to keep this conversation safe and constructive, but if at any time you feel distressed, you are welcome to reach out to our peer support or counselling services for additional support.

[cloudcore]

Question 1:

What feelings on the emotion wheel do you most often experience when you are sad? 

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tagging members who have shown interest and participated in the emotions topics: @BlueBay @RedHorse @Arizona @SJT63 @Owen45 @Appleblossom @Eve7 @Bow @Snowie @Shaz51 @JungleGiants @BPDSurvivor @wellwellwellnez @NatureLover @Oaktree @Wattle3 @utopia @mum12 @MIFANTCARER @pinklollipop15 @Millieme @Anastasia @Jorge @CogsWhirl @Clawde @SunFlowersHope 

[SJT63]

I'm going with

Disappointed

Powerless

Isolated

[AlwaysHappy]

I haven't been tagged, but I'd like to join if that's okay. I feel grief, empty, isolated most when it comes to sadness.

[cloudcore]

@AlwaysHappy you are absolutely welcome to join, thank you for your response 

When I experience sadness, I tend to feel isolated, powerless, hurt and empty.

from cloudcore

[Owen45]

Worthlessness, hopelessness, depression

[utopia]

Like you stated. Sadness is a completely different emotion than Clinical Depression. Although some of the feelings may cross over into both. Especially, if like me, your negative self talk, goes 1 hundred miles an hour when both Depressed and struggling with painful emotions, like sadness.

Sadness to me is mainly all about feeling extremely lonely and isolated. Plus feeling fragile and despair. And feeling not worthy. (that negative self talk).

I am lonely and I crave stimulating conversations about issues I consider important. I have 1 best friend since childhood, but we really have little in common. So she doesn't help fill this need.

The other part of being lonely, is not having a loving partner. I have been single for 13 years. So no dating, no sex, no kissing or hugs, not even hand holding. And I crave to be part of a loving relationship.

When that sadness hits, my negative talk takes over and tells me constantly why I don't have those special friendships or a special love. And that self talk is beyond cruel.

Covid restrictions and lockdowns have increased by feelings of being isolated.

[Arizona]

Hi @cloudcore and others.

Question 1:

Lonely

Despair

Depressed 

Disappointed 

Isolated

Abandoned

Grief

Also, I wasn't able to complete the Fear exercise. It was too much for me. I will try to come back to it.

[RedHorse]

Q1. The feelings I experience most often when sad are depressed, inferior and empty and lonely, isolated and abandoned.

@cloudcore 

[CogsWhirl]

For mine,

I feel isolated, fragile, powerless, inferior  empty.  I can't see it on the wheel, buit i also constantly  ruminate around feelings of  regret with the decisions that I have made particularly around marriage and staying in it. I beat myself up because I was hurting, but still clinging to this fantasy that one day, she would  turn around and love me back.