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Penitensive
New Contributor

Treatment Authority

  • So Im posting because I have so much frustration counselling isn't really dealing with it, all they can really do is empathise. 

Trigger Warning: Involuntary Community Treatment Order

Content/trigger warning

I've been under a treatment authority for a year, in that time I've been subjected to forced injections. While in hospital I had a nurse call me a *r*t*rd*, another call me a 2 year old (I have a Dissociative disorder 🙃)

I've had a doctor threaten me with police over rescheduling an appointment..

Im sure some of you have similar stories of the abusive ways this system can exert its authority.

 

I don't doubt it helps people, sure, but that's how they get you, you need help so you have to go to them, but then you get stuck in their system.

You might have to spend weeks amongst other acutely mentally ill people, and if their condition exacerbates yours, well that will just extend your stay. 

 

The Doctors pretend to have conversations with you when they don't care at all about what you say, they just observe you for indications, assess you like a case rather than a person. 

But maybe that's just my experience. 

 

I don't doubt others have better experiences, 

But mine is that this is like an abusive relationship I can't leave. 

 

I went to them for help and they used that to trap me under their care, declared me incompetent to care for myself and so removed my ability to make choices for my own well-being. 

 

If I do anything to try to defy them, they will clamp down, they'll threaten me with police, hospital or more injections.

 

They'll act like their abuses are unfortunate incidents that don't represent their treatment as a whole, that they're just nice people trying to help. 

Which of course, a lot of them are, but how do you tell those decent ones in the system? 

In my experience the younger doctors who haven't been indoctrinated so much are better at helping, they're not so jaded as the consultant psychiatrists, some of which are lovely,

but you never know if you'll get an abuser who gets off on the power, uses it to coerce patients into submitting to their authority. 

 

Some of them are only nice and friendly to your face, because that's their job. 

 

I once had a junior doctor seem totally helpful through the time in hospital, but when it came time for the review tribunal, he brings out things I said 5 years ago, attacks my character and does everything he can to represent me as just a crazy person who needs treatment. 

 

Im sick of them abusing me, threatening me and trying to control me. 

Im sick of them telling me that they're helping me while refusing to allow me to have my treatment handle by my private psychiatrist. 

 

I feel so stupid for asking for help, I should have learned my lesson the last time I had a hospitalisation, that the public mental health system is deeply flawed, in many cases causes trauma while it works. 

 

You don't get to ask for help, you get to ask for involuntary treatment. 

 

Out of 3 times I've been in hospital, I've asked for help each time. Every time they've immediately made me involuntary. 

 

Does common sense mean nothing in this process? How can someone who asks for help be involuntary? 

 

I wasn't sent to hospital because I was a risk of harming myself, or others. 

I wasn't there because I committed a crime. 

How is it law that they get to reduce my rights because they decide I'm not competent? I asked for help, clearly showing I could make decisions for my own well being.. 

 

Im just so, sick of this ta hanging over my head, my partner keeps telling me to be smart and just get through the appointments and tell them what they need to hear, but the idea of going along with this, saying yes sir, no sir.. 

It makes me sick. 

I want to scream and rage that they don't get to keep controlling me with the threat of hospital or injections or police, I want to make them send the police and when I refuse to let them take me to hospital, they can just break in with their guns and shoot me because there is no way in hell I am going back to that hospital where they just abuse me, calling me a r*t*rd. 

 

And yes, right after I called this nurse out on it, he tried to deny it happened, that I was just crazy. 

 

I wish I'd showed that nurse the error of his ways, that abusing a vulnerable patient under your care because you're too immature to shut your damn mouth, to call one of your patients a r*t*Rd? 

And these people tell me they're HELPING ME? 

 

They're ABUSING ME. 

It's the GOVERNMENT and instead of helping me they're just abusing me, and I'm beyond done with this. 

 

At this point I want to give them the finger and go noncompliant just to feel better about myself not tolerating their abuse, not rolling over like a little bitch accepting their authority over me. 

 

I know to just tolerate the situation and do what, they expect of me would be the smart thing to do, and that makes me SICK. 

It's just another way to control their patients, by making the only way out, the *smart thing* to be accepting their abuse meekly. 

 

 

3 REPLIES 3

Re: Treatment Authority

G'day @Penitensive ,

 

Firstly, Welcome to the forums.

 

Thank you for sharing your experiences with us. It certainly sounds very dehumanising and I'm sorry you have had to experience this.

 

I have added a spoiler tag and a trigger warning to you post so that the wider community has to option whether they'd like to continue reading or not.

 

I think your experiences speak to what is happening very often, and I'm sure other members will be able to share their experiences with you too.

 

Once again, I'm so sorry this is happening for you. I hope things will change so that your voice is heard.

 

Sitting with you,

tyme

Re: Treatment Authority

@Penitensive
I am truly sorry that you feel so desperate and have had so many negative interactions. Through my life I too have been disappointed with psychiatric treatments ,though your experiences are much more severe than mine.

If one is lucky ,it seems that medication will assist some people -but it all seems rather ‘hit and miss’.
I suspect that there is too much labelling of sufferers when really very , very little is yet known about the human mind/psyche etc.
It cant be easy to be a mental health worker so they should have LOTS of support too - because we desperately need for them to be patient, respectful , fair, intelligent , empathetic as they try to help us to unravel our problems.

Their knowledge is far from complete but it’s all we’ve got at this stage in history.
I’m afraid “getting help” is often a matter of luck rather than good management and just a ‘good listener’ can often be the best support of all.
I sincerely hope that things improve for you and that you can feel
you are being listened to properly.
My thoughts and good wishes are going out to you

Re: Treatment Authority

@Penitensive  I don’t even know where to begin your story is so similar to mine the system can be so traumatic and horrible and I too hate the forced injections and the ways they talk about you at the tribunal like you are completely off your head the way when the nurse insults you and abuses you they can just claim they never did and that you are just crazy and everyone believes them because they are a nurse. It can all be so damaging and horrible to go through. I also really feel what you said about not just accepting their treatment. Like it just makes you feel sick when you have to just sit there and take it when all you want to do is run away and get away from them. Like it is so dehumanizing to just have to feel like you aren’t even trying to fight it even if fighting gets you nowhere sometimes fighting feels better like you are at least being true to yourself. It is hard to explain but I can really empathize and I am so sorry you are also going through all this stuff. 

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