Red's house

[The-red-centaur]

Tonight I'm feeling like what is the point. I try so hard to get ahead, get somewhere, do anything so I don't feel like a waste. 

Its so hard when effort has no outcomes. Physically, my body keeps failing, mental its a roller-coaster. 

I had so much i needed to do today. I slept most of it instead. I feel worse. The pain is intense, its hard to breathe, im so exhausted just by doing nothing. Life just doesn't seem to need me in it. 

[tyme]

Hey @The-red-centaur , I can see there are some pretty heavy feels there that you are sitting with tonight. 

What do you think would be helpful for you at the moment?

[The-red-centaur]

Idk. Everything just hurts. I'm tired. I took my meds early so hope sleep will come. 

[tyme]

Sitting with you @The-red-centaur I really hope things improve and you get some rest soon.

[The-red-centaur]

@tyme i just wish my body functioned. No matter what i do or whatever, it just gets worse. I don't want to be wasting my life but im exhausted 24/7. No one understands how even breathing is draining. It's heavy, it hurts, I could barely get up to use the bathroom today. This isn't life. 

[tyme]

Sounds like such a tough one tonight @The-red-centaur . I hope tomorrow is a new day with a new beginning @The-red-centaur 

Take care my friend.

[The-red-centaur]

@tyme thanks. 

I had a deap sleep but feel shit this morning. 

I have an early physio session then I'll probably do nothing the rest of the day. 

I have so much housework to catch up on, but i don't know if I'll be able to. The state of my house is crap and the support workers aren't allowed to do it. 

[The-red-centaur]

I just got a call from my support coordinator with ndis. 

My provider is no longer able to support me and I have to move 😞

[Jynx]

Nooooo @The-red-centaur that is so rough!! Oh hun 🥺 

Moving house is never fun but being forced to move? Is your support getting reduced or will you have to change providers? SO much uprooting of your sense of consistency and routine!! 

I am so sorry you are facing such a distressing situtation 💜

[The-red-centaur]

@Jynx i have to change provider