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Shizzy
New Contributor

In over my head

I am 26 and I have been living with severe Borderline personality disorder and major depressive disorder as well as EDNOS (eating disorder not otherwise specified) and PTSD for my whole life. Around 10 years ago I attempted suicide and ended up with severe brain damage and over 130 broken bones. Except this whole time I have been feeling more and more depressed and worthless and desperate for help except the only thing is that I already have some therapists that I see but nothing seems to be working. I am in way over my head here! Completely desperate!

6 REPLIES 6

Re: In over my head

Hi @Shizzy and welcome to the sane forums. So glad you have joined us.

I am sorry to hear that even though you have some therapists, you still feel like nothing is working and feel desperate.

There are many members on here that will be able to relate to what you are saying, including me.

I hope you find the support you are looking for on here.

Talk again soon 💜

Re: In over my head

@Shizzy @Snowie 

I understand how suicide can have such an impact on someone's life, I have been through attempted suicide myself.

I have learnt to take things day by day. I try to figure out what works for me. To start off with it may be just getting out of bed. It takes time to recover and navigate what works and doesn't work.

 

It took over a year to get back on my feet after the last time I attempted suicide during a psychotic episode. I had to take it one day at a time. Not overload myself with things. Baby steps. Get out of bed, have something to eat, watch tv and gradually from there I started to take more interest in life. I started to want to participate in group activities whether online or in person. I started to reclaim my identity. There were hiccups along the way, but rather than looking at them all at once, I learnt to write down what some were and tackled them one at a time rather than all at once, because that is just overwhelming.

 

Maybe you might want to write down what some of your challenges are as a list and then chat with your therapists about your list in more detail. Maybe get them to focus on just one of your challenges off your list and see what strategies can arise from it.

 

If you feel like you want to chat with someone over the phone you can call lifeline on 131114 or chat with someone directly online or via text by going to https://www.lifeline.org.au/

Re: In over my head

Thankyou so much for your support and care! I really appreciate it! Those are fantastic ideas to start with.

Re: In over my head

hello @Shizzy , how are you going today xx

just letting you know you are not alone my friend 

Hugs @jem80@Snowie@BPDSurvivor@utopia 

Re: In over my head

Dear @Shizzy ,

 

Welcome to these forums. It comes with a wealth of knowledge and experience, both from lived experience and also as carers.


My heart goes out to you. You are definitely not alone. I agree with @jem80  - one step at a time. Getting out of bed is an achievement.

 

Besides therapists, do you have any supports at home?

 

Struggling with BPD can be a challenge, but it can also be extremely rewarding. I can hear you are struggling at this time. Therapy for BPD takes more than just a few trips to the therapist. It takes months and months of trying a 'new' way to change things, including your mindset. This means reaching outside your comfort zone. I used to be annoyed that I couldn't just take a magic pill to improve the symptoms of BPD. After 18 months of intense BPD treatment (approx 3-4 hrs per week), I can actually say I have changed - for the better. 

Hang in there my dear. You are stronger than you think. BPD is not a life sentence. Rather, it is an amazing journey of discovery. 

Have a browse through some of the other BPD threads such as Hi All.

 

Hugs,

BPDSurvivor

Re: In over my head

Hi @Shizzy ! Just want to check in to see how you are going.

 

BPDSurvivor

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