Lived Experience Forum

[NateCampo]

I don't know if this is the right spot but here goes.

Since 2015 I have been hounded by my ex-wife and her family.  I spent 16 months in prison for something I didn't do, and was released on appeal at the end of 2019. I thought I could get back my life, get married to my fiance, but no more false allegations. I have waited for a trial since being arrested in January 2020. Many false starts. The testimony given by my ex is ridiculous but yet I wait for my trial in August this year. The WA DPP and WA Police are terrible, and I don't believe that justice will be done and I'll be back in prison.

Late last year due to the pressure of everything myself and my fiance separated, she could not sustain any more. In january I tried to end my life only to have my now ex-fianace revivie me. I am broken. I love her so very much but I am never going to get my life back. I am tired and wish she never revived me. I put a strain on my friends and I hate that becuase I talk about wanting to end my life. I am lost for words and feel hopeless. Thank you for listening to my story, but it is complicated and so many things have happened and I just want the pain to stop for me, my ex-fiance and my friends but when your up against the system you just can't win  

[FTG]

The system is broken everywhere in Australia please don't let it get you down. [edited by moderators] Goodluck

[Hetho3]

Hi that’s quite a predicament for you see if you can get justice for something you didn’t do a magistrate might exonerate you from all charges… Try to get back with your X-fioncee if you can…

[tyme]

Hi @NateCampo ,

It sounds so hard @NateCampo . I appreciate you sharing your story with the community. As much as we can't provide advice in legal matters, we CAN focus on how this is affecting you mentally.

I read that you love your ex-fiance very much. Do you want to be with her? Do you think she'd be able to support you through this?

[NateCampo]

Hi @tyme, I love her so much but I’ve just messed everything up. I started drinking to handle my pain, withdrew from the world. I wish she would support me but she too is broke from all of this.

yes I do want to be with her, but it’s now all too late. I’m lost and feel very lonely. I’ve just finished a degree but have no job prospects because of everything that has happened .

I can’t see a future. When I was with her I fought for us, although I often gave up hope, I got back up. Now there is no point

[tyme]

Hi there @NateCampo ,

As much as you feel you have "messed everything up", I know there is a part of you that wants to keep going. The fact that you are reaching out tells me that you want something to change.

I don't know the future so I don't know whether you will be with your ex-fiance, but I can say that you are the author of your story. What do you want your story to look like? Don't let voices of people pull that away from you.

I've messed up in my life too (who hasn't?). There are things I am not proud of. There are things I wish I never did. Yet I cannot change the past. I can only make a difference to my future.

I am here today for a reason. I am not perfect, but I want to share my experiences so that other people (esp young people) learn from MY mistakes, rather than make the mistakes themselves.

Sometimes it's a hard road. But things that are worth it are worth fighting for.

Just hold on. Things WILL change.

[FTG]

Can you get legal aid to help with your legal issues? 

As much as drinking feels like it helps it really is only a quick fix in my experience anyway try surrounding yourself with friends and family or a hobby? 

Join a local fb group even to meet people on there. I hope it all works out for you.

[NateCampo]

Hi @FTG , Yes I have legal aid lawyers. I just can't handle the prospect of going to prison again for something I did not do.

I have got help for my drinking and continue to do counseling.

[CrazyChick]

@NateCampo,

Waiting for over 3 years for your trial is a long time to have this stress hanging over you. Unfortunately the so-called justice system is very slow - having a huge effect on many involved including those accused. People who have been accused are often not treated like they are innocent until proven guilty, but suffer huge effects before even reaching trial - including effects on employment, relationships, and mental health. It is quite understandable that under this stress you feel broken and hopeless about things improving. But your trial will eventually happen and you will be able to move onto the next stage of your life. It sounds like you are doing the best you can in very trying circumstances. You are seeking Legal support and hopefully they are also doing their best to help you. You are seeking counselling and support to avoid alcohol as an unhelpful coping mechanism. Even though it seems like many things are going wrong for you and this can be very challenging - it may help to focus on some things that you can still enjoy. You can enjoy tasty foods, watching plants grow and change, reading about things of interest, watching movies or shows, listening to your favourite music. These little things help us to get through the toughest of times until things can start to improve.