Lived Experience Forum

[Chloe3]

Hey, so I’m new to this forum  and I guess I joined to talk to people who know where I’m coming from. I have suffered from GAD since forever and depression for the last 8 years it has been well controlled until recently. The last month has been terrible and resulted in being off work the last theee weeks. I have had medications changed and things improved enough to get out of bed and be a slightly better parent.  I attempted to go back to work there, and it felt like it was a disaster. I had a panic attack, making mistakes that where picked up, anxious the whole day I just felt sick. Even after I left work and I guess today too still. I can’t afford to take any more time off but can I ask to just return two days a week?? I’m too anxious to ask my boss as I haven’t felt supported throughout this episode. Can you ask your gp?? I don’t know what to do.

[M_P90]

Currently very depressed as well so you're definitely not alone.

From my understanding, best practice is, exactly what you're proposing there, a partial return until you can build your confidence again. The longer you're away the harder it gets to return at all. But going back to full duties immediately was overwhelming and that makes sense. The GP can support a request for reduced hours. The Black Dog has resources for employees and employers on how to support workers with mental health issues.

That said, ideal and real world can be really far apart. When I tried to do what you've asked for with an employer I got messed around and shoved out, it was probably illegal but I was too unwell to contemplate legal action. What helped me was finding a part time job elsewhere with very supportive management, and I've been able to cope.

This week, I'm almost just-lying-in-bed level but working from home has been enough to keep me connected to my job and give me some movement in my day (from bed to desk).

I'm sure you'll figure it out, but definitely do talk to your GP and health professionals first.

[BPDSurvivor]

Hi @M_P90 @Chloe3 ,

Thank you for sharing. 

I’ve worked through depression and anxiety while working. It was not a nice time. I remember all day wanting to run home to hide. Sometimes I’d take time out in the bathroom to cry - just to let it out.

However, I can see how panic attacks and making mistakes can have an effect on your work. It’s sad you don’t feel supported by your boss.

Do you have any professional supports who can work with you to control your breathing to reduce the likelihood of panic attacks? Or help you with your overall Mental Health?

Other option? It’s a seller’s market out there. There are so many different jobs available. Since covid, the hybrid model of working has become the norm. Would you seek out another job?