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16-01-2022 06:44 PM
16-01-2022 06:44 PM
Re: Are you a people pleaser?????
Kudos to both of you @Shaz51 . Hope you have an easy day tomorrow.
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18-01-2022 11:09 AM
18-01-2022 11:09 AM
Re: Are you a people pleaser?????
Yes, I have always been a people pleaser, particularly in the workplace, I am tired of it. All part of mental health issues.
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18-01-2022 07:21 PM
18-01-2022 07:21 PM
Re: Are you a people pleaser?????
I guess it was the traditional way I have been raised: don't dare to speak your mind, listen and be condescending.
But working hard these days towards building on my assertiveness.
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18-01-2022 09:12 PM
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18-01-2022 09:43 PM
18-01-2022 09:43 PM
Re: Are you a people pleaser?????
Thanks for asking @Shaz51 . Hoping for a better day tomorrow. I'm sad because a neighbour cut down the (flowering) red rose, the orangeblossom and the guava.
Hope your day was OK.
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19-01-2022 01:04 AM
19-01-2022 01:04 AM
Re: Are you a people pleaser?????
Sorry, please ignore that last post.
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19-01-2022 07:57 AM
19-01-2022 07:57 AM
Re: Are you a people pleaser?????
Ohh no @Dimity , sorry to hear about the plants xx
Hope you get some more
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19-01-2022 09:05 AM
19-01-2022 09:05 AM
Re: Are you a people pleaser?????
I hear you @Owen45
im very much the same way
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20-01-2022 10:34 AM
20-01-2022 10:34 AM
Re: Are you a people pleaser?????
I found only pleased particular people e.g my dad and my bosses at work.
Worked out it was about not getting the attention /forgiveness from my father and on playing that issue.
So yeah there is always something under the pleasing
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20-01-2022 02:12 PM
20-01-2022 02:12 PM
Re: Are you a people pleaser?????
I try to think of it as a bridge. I enjoy creating blessings in the life of others around me, but a bridge needs and anchor point on the other side as well. If I am being mistaken for a doormat I continue to respond as politely as I can, but withdraw my efforts re “pleasing”.
The fall-back is just providing enough energy to tick the common decency box, but nothing more. It’s setting limits on yourself if the anchor with the other person isn’t there.
That is really hard if there are relationship issues involved, such as a parent who has “trained” you to give them your all with no parent-child boundaries instilled along the way, but that usually needs a counsellor to help
you sort out ……
Hugs to all who need one ….. ❤️