Lived Experience Forum

[TAB]

Signal Dropped out/went to shops @Dimity  thanks

Still seems a lot of stuff looking around. Will be trips to salvos, bin leave stuff for takers. Yes a lot less than after house prob 1/10th if that but want to do in car only no trailer etc 

[Dimity]

Sounds like a fresh start @TAB 

[Dimity]

It's good he's not only willing but receptive @Appleblossom . Hope it lasts

[NatureLover]

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@Dimity wrote:

@NatureLover no there's no cut-off date but there's pressures and the situation is complicated with no easy solutions... a close relationship is at stake and there'll be many repercussions whatever I decide. 

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Oh gosh @Dimity  - sounds like a lot of pressure on you 😞

Wishing you clarity as you make decisions - it doesn't sound easy. 

[NatureLover]

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@Appleblossom wrote:

AND he asked me to show him how to clean the stove!

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Wow, @Appleblossom !!  🙂

[Appleblossom]

Thanks for your responses @NatureLover  and @Dimity 

I believe it is actually very important that we have been able to manage without too much tension over the tidiness issue.  His father whinged and ridiculed his mother's cleaning and tidiness from the beginning of the marriage.  It put me in a very dubious position of doomed if I do and doomed if I dont.  Cos then he would also shame me for something not spotless, when it suited him. I was also the one who tidied up dangerous tools which he left laying around. It is a complex issue in many relationships and not just about having things spick and span.  So I have been very careful and thoughtful about my approach with my son.  I expect he will go through tidy and messy phases, but he is taking responsibility, which I think will be an ongoing part of his character.

[TAB]

hmm sounds familiar with whinging about cleanliness of house ,then if worse day would be quaility,quantity of food or bought the wrong thing at shop or dares to have opinion different to mind reader in chief 'oh such and such foood nott doo zett  oh really how do you know that ... lol @Appleblossom  then the kids listen to it etc. would not have wanted to be my first few attempts at girlfriends .had absorbed to much, all the bad and was no good

[Appleblossom]

Somehow I have survived ... @TAB   a little the wiser.

[TAB]

Well thats good @Appleblossom 

[Dimity]

Well after a month away from it (various crises then recovery time) I'm about to re-engage @NatureLover @Shaz51 @Appleblossom @TAB. I have high hopes for tabletops, a filing cabinet or two, and autumn plantings before Easter. There's so much more to be done but it feels as though I'm starting over, when I'd hoped to be so much further advanced (in late October I set myself an interim goal of 6 months).