Looking after ourselves
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24-09-2019 10:31 PM - edited 24-09-2019 10:36 PM
24-09-2019 10:31 PM - edited 24-09-2019 10:36 PM
Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.
End is in sight but still ongoing @Former-Member
Approaching 12 months since the storm that created the damage and 5 months since restoration work commenced.
On a seperate issue battle with electricity provider is just beginning to warm up. Contacted the energy ombudsman today after 6 months of trying to find a solution with supplier.
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10-10-2019 10:25 PM
10-10-2019 10:25 PM
Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.
Had a bit of a moment tonight...
There was a news article about mental health week and the quoted stats on mh particually the loss of loved ones to mental health left me rattled moreso than usual :face_with_rolling_eyes:
Feeling fragile generally atm 🥴
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10-10-2019 10:33 PM
10-10-2019 10:33 PM
Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.
Been in that spot a few times myself @Determined. 😞
Thinking of you, praying.
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10-10-2019 11:05 PM
10-10-2019 11:05 PM
Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.
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10-10-2019 11:07 PM
10-10-2019 11:07 PM
Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.
We have come so far but the emotions are always so close to the surface. Really feeling for you at the moment @Smc with all you are managing.
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11-10-2019 08:19 AM
11-10-2019 08:19 AM
Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.
With you both @Determined @Smc have felt like howling a few times recently too.
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11-10-2019 08:21 AM
11-10-2019 08:21 AM
Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.
Thanks @Determined.
I was talking with another mum yesterday who also has a daughter living in a dangerous space, for different but still MI related reasons. Dunno... I try to get on with day to day life, but every now and then I realise how far away from "normal" things actually are. (And talking to someone else who is trying to make "unreasonable" adjustments for their MI offspring kind of highlights that.)
I was looking around our yard yesterday evening, and mentally listing off what I've been planning to do out there. I don't think any of it sounds unrealistic, but its been unachievable to date. (Not saying that in the sense of "I give up". More in the sense of "Are my plans reasonable?".)
In the context of everyday "normal", a lot of it would have happened a long time ago. I'm aware that at whatever point things change, we'll probably undergo a slowly unfolding shock realisation of how much we're currently weighed down, in all parts of our lives. Probably goes for most of us Sane Forum carers.
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11-10-2019 08:36 AM
11-10-2019 08:36 AM
Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.
I find it best not to plan too far ahead and whilst I have potentially achievable dreams & goals, no matter how small, I don't put time limits on them @Smc @Determined.
.
Yes, we do get weighed down at times and I find I need to be honest with myself when this begins to happen.
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11-10-2019 09:14 AM
11-10-2019 09:14 AM
Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.
@Former-Member, I'm trying to break down the long term goals into achievable "small bites". My shed clearig schedule is one example.
It'll be trickier when it comes to fixing up our house though. A lot of those tasks can't be "small bites", and building related permits have inbuilt time limits... but will cross those bridges when we get there.
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11-10-2019 09:56 AM - edited 11-10-2019 05:05 PM
11-10-2019 09:56 AM - edited 11-10-2019 05:05 PM
Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.
@Smc @Former-Member
Looking around the yard at all dreams and projects...
That's a bit like what it was like when we left our old home. It has so much potential 🙁
Understand how you both feel. Definatly a common theme for carers