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Looking after ourselves

Yep
Casual Contributor

Aspie Relationship

Hi, So my wife has had an injury.  In typical Aspie fashion, I researched and followed the script to help her through the Hospital experience.  Now she is home, the recovery is painfully slow.  She is frustrated.  I am having to care for her significantly.  Our roles have changed.  Its been very difficult. 

 

I am becoming very confused about her changed behaviour. Then I get it, a revelation!  She is not performing to the script I expect of her. No wonder I am confused as I am dealing with change. 

 

She is not identifiable anymore, a stranger to me.  Yes my wife a stranger! But that's being an Aspie.  I have to take a breath and realise I am learning a new script.  Given the chance the new routines will become familiar.  Rather than resist and get upset, I simply observe, think, adapt and act.  I have done that all my life so I am very good at it.  A master sleuth.

 

It's ok that the most stable part of my life, a family member is going through change.  Scary yes, initially anyway, but when I think about it, not so confronting.

2 REPLIES 2

Re: Aspie Relationship

Welcome @Yep 

Your post was beautiful and had lots of tender heart.  Who said Aspie's dont have feelings!  Btw I identify as aspie but no formal diagnosis.  Change is difficult but doable in chunks.

I hope the forum is helpful.

Smiley Happy

Re: Aspie Relationship

It sounds like you have it figured out @Yep, it can be hard for everyone when the recovery doesn't fit the script, even the person who is recovering. How are things going now?

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