Lived Experience Forum

[Mimm]

Hey everyone, I just was looking for some advice. As I am unsure of what to do. I am not going so well in the past two weeks with my self harm thoughts and have been working alongside the hospitals acute care team. They constantly check in with me and are working with me to get through this tough time. At the moment I feel like a rock in a tough spot. I start dbt in a week and my adopted family are going away for the week to Sydney. They have invited me along. However I spent all last night crying and freaking out because I am scared. I am scared of myself, by that I mean I am scared because I have been getting constant thoughts that do not go away, I am scared that if I go to Sydney and something happens I am away from my support team. I guess the question is, would you guys go if you were in my shoes? Or would you stay back and keep attending the appointments with the hospital to try and get a grip on what is going on?

[Findingmyway]

Hi Mimm
I'm sorry you are feeling this way. I cannot offer any advice, but I want to let you know that you are understood. It can be such a dilemma to be in. I hope you get some relief soon. M

[Former-Member]

Hi @Mimm,

will your support team be available by phone when you are away. I've been away before and had scheduled phone appointments and been able to ring too. Do you have a phone you can do this with? Is your family supportive and understand what's going on? I think that hopefully being away would distract you but I understand you need to feel supported too for that to happen. Maybe if you speak to the mental health team they can find a way to help you feel supported whilst you are away and then you can do both, have a holiday with your family and keep working on your mental health. They may be able to do Skype appointments whilst you are away too. I hope this helps. Best of luck with this @Mimm💜😊🤗

[utopia]

@Mimm. Maybe this trip is just the wrong time for you. Being that your SH thoughts are high at the moment & you are struggling to keep them under control.
Maybe it might be better if you stay close to your mental health support team at this time.
Sydney can wait till you feel stronger.
Ultimately this is your decision. You need to fo what's right for you.
Regardless of your decision, I wish you all the best

[NikNik]

Great advice, different perspectives and support @utopia @Former-Member & @Findingmyway

@Mimm - How did you go with deciding?

[utopia]

Hi @Mimm. How are you doing today? Did you end up going to Sydney or did you stay home?

[Mimm]

Hey everyone - @utopia, @NikNik, @Former-Member, @Findingmyway,

How are you all? Sorry for not responding until now. I have been so caught up in my daily tasks that I haven't had time to get back online. I ended up going to Sydney, however it wasn't really by a choice for leisure. I ended up back in emergency and acute care we're looking at admitting me to the wards. I didn't want to so the only option I had left was to fly to Sydney to stay with my adopted family. So I did that. It was hard and the contact line didn't work for my support network. So I felt really shut out. And this week I started at the clinic, I am now doing dbt twice a week and am hopefully starting an art therapy class soon too. Not instantly fixed or thoughts gone, but a step forward I guess. Just struggling through day by day.

[utopia]

@Mimm. Unfortunately no therapy is an instant 'fix' - but great to hear that you are attending dbt twice a week.
I think we have a lot of members that find art therapy so helpful. Sounds like you may also be an arty type.
Do you have any plans for tonight or this weekend?
I'm chilling out tonight - reading.
Thinking I might go to the movies tomorrow night. Will just see how I feel after mowing a 1/4 acre block of grass. Love spring. Dislike springs grass growth. Lol

[Mimm]

Hey @utopia, yeah it sucks. One lady that I talk to quite often at the hospital wishes she had a magic wand to fix everything. But I understand, it will take time and nothing is an instant fix. Plans this weekend - nothing really, most of the adopted family I live with are home or leaving this weekend for time away, so will probably just chill and watch television. What movie are you going to see? Yeah, spring is amazing just the fine print of allergies or plant growth gets some people. Good luck on the mowing!

[utopia]

@Mimm. I'm looking at the grass now - but feeling too lazy or content or relaxed to really start. Lol.
Yes my boy gets hayfever and has had to restart taking his tablets.
I'd still like a magic wand, but only now that I've started to feel better. I think if I didn't get sick 2 - 3 years ago now - I wouldn't be at this point where I am rediscovering who I am - what things I like. And you know what?
The so called good the bad and the ugly. I like it all. It's my personality. And I'm starting to love me again.
But I would use the wand to have the garden mow itself and the housework magically done and my sons homework done - without him whinging.
I'm glad you are on this journey @Mimm. It may be bloody awful at times - but when you start learning and putting things together - well - you learn how to live a good life with MI.
I think you are well and truly on that road