Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[Arla]

Hi, I have just found this forum. I have been with my partner for three years and there have been times when she is down but this year it has gotten worse and she has told me she thinks she has depression or some kind of spilt personality disorder. She is now pushing me away telling me she just brings me down and I deserve better but I just want to help her. When I talk about her seeking help she blows me off. I am emotional too and find it hard to see her upset so she has been avoiding talking about it with me but now says she can't hide it anymore and I should just leave her. There is no way I am leaving her, I want to help her but don't know how. Are there free therapists or doctors she can go to in Adelaide? How can I be there for her? Any help appreciated.

[Shimmer]

Hi @Arla and welcome to the SANE Forums, I'm glad you found us! 🙂

Wow, it sounds like things are really tough for you and your partner at the moment! It’s clear that you care about her very much, I imagine it would be so hard to see her feeling down and want to help her, only to be pushed away.

It sounds really difficult that she tends to blow off conversations about help seeking. What tends to happen when you approach her about it? If you like, we could talk about ways to have this conversation? Trying to convince someone you care about to get help is a common issue people face, perhaps others on the Forums may have insights to share.

In terms of finding help, seeing a GP is a great first step, as they can do an initial assessment and provide a referral to a psychologist under the Mental Health Care Plan. This means that the person gets 10 sessions with a Medicare rebate, which significantly reduces the cost. Your partner could either ask the GP to recommend a psychologist or look up one herself – the Australian Psychological Society has a database of psychologists that you can search by location, presenting issue (e.g. depression) and treatment approach if you have a preference. You can search through their website here or call them on 1800 333 497.

As well as getting some professional support, you mentioned that she has had down times in the past, I’m curious, what else has helped previously?

@Arla, are you looking after yourself amongst all this? You mentioned that you are emotional too and find it hard to see her upset, are there any self-care things that you can do during hard times that are helpful?

Feel free to share more about how this experience is affecting you @Arla, the Forums are a wonderful supportive community and we are here for you!

Shimmer 🙂

[NikNik]

Hi @Arla

I hope you found @Shimmer 's response helpful.
Just wondering how you're travelling this week?
Nik