Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[PeppiPatty]

Hi all, 

My name is @PeppyPatti,

I've been a communicator of Sane Forums for a little while now but I find it easier to talk about ...stuff then what's really happening in my life. 

I am a fulltime carer for my husband who was diagnosed with Chronic Paranoid Schizophrenia when he was 21....we are both 48 now. 

He has spent a few days in hospital from severe addiction to cigarettes, he quit illegal substances and alcohol addiction for our marriage to work about 2 years ago but the last week, he's so manic....I can't even go to the tiolet without him crying....Where are you? what are you doing? 

He quit smoking about a week ago. I am so tired .......It feels like I'm doing all the work while he constantly talks and expects all these hairbrained things to happen........

Help !!

[Faith-and-Hope]

Feeling for you @PeppiPatty, but not sure what to suggest ...... call and speak to the hospital here he was staying and ask for a support person ?

Maybe chat with the SANE HELPLINE tomorrow and see what they suggest ?

Big hugs .....

💜💕🌷

[suzanne]

Hi @PeppiPatty, suzanne here.  I'm a week late on this but wondering how things have been going?  Were you thinking that the change in his behaviour was connected to quitting smoking or something else? 

I hope you've managed to get some rest and a bit of a break since first posting this

[PeppiPatty]

Hi @suzanne

To tell the truth it's been a nightmare. Poor husband tries very hard but.....his condition gets ahead of him. 

It's like he....goes back to remembering the really dark days and beginning to act them out.

One subject that I dislike speaking about is money. I find speaking about money is crass because we all have issues with how little we get paid and also....the insensetivity of others seeing how hard our lives are. Im not saying I'm right but this is just how I feel. 

But when husband quit smoking, he decided to purchase himself a violin. So, he gets on aliexpress and buys a violin...he can't play or anything but it was.......money dissolving .......we really need to survive. He has a huge bill to pay back his Dad for his heavy smoking....I've made him promise to pay his poor Dad back $100 per fortnight......... then when I get annoyed about him going a little....weird and boying a violin,he says I'm stressing him out and goes outside to smoke 3 cigars yesterday.

I am lucky because I have a friend who is my support person and gave me about a 4 days of food this morning. 

What is my husband going to do? He is going to call his DAd who lives only on a pension and borrow more money from him.......

Whats the use?

Help. 

I'm going for a walk. Ille be back in 3 hours. 

[PeppiPatty]

Great Idea @Faith-and-Hope

Ille call em when I get back for a walk. orry my message is so messy. 

Hugs back and a few of those beautiful little flowers to you 

[Acacia]

I’m sorry to hear how difficult things have been lately @PeppiPattyPeppipatty. You sound like a very understanding and supportive wife.

I just wanted to let you know the SANE Helpline is available Monday to Friday 9am to 5pm Eastern time so may not be open when you get back from your long walk. But feel free to try tomorrow or call the Samaritans or Lifeline after hours.

Please take care of yourself and keep us all in the loop.

[PeppiPatty]

it's difficult because 

I've chosen to be with my darling whose had a wretched mental ill health journey for many years.

[Faith-and-Hope]

@PeppiPatty

❤

[Appleblossom]

I dont talk a lot about money @PeppiPatty but it is one of the facts of life.  Maybe he doesnt realise all the stress you go through to run the household that he is so lucky to have the comfort of.  They need to know those things .. that is not crass .. its necessary information.  If he can buy online he needs to know about the boring old bills.  Dont blow the concept of paranoid schizophrenia to be something it is not.  They can often do complex operations and computer programming at times ... and be helped to make ends meet.

Take care bella

[Shaz51]

sending you hugs @PeppiPatty 

how are you going my friend xx