Lived Experience Forum

[utopia]

@Former-Member. 10 weeks when I was in hospital I made a decision to not watch read or listen to the news. That's because it wasn't helping my recovery, it was hindering it.
After leaving hospital if thd news was on the tele, I'd be in the kitchen cooking. I could still hear little bits but it was easy enough to tune out of. My son kept me up what he thought was important - soccer scores, footy scores - any scores. I'm able to watch some shows again like SVU. I didn't mean to watch that 4 corners episode. I turned the channel right when it started and I couldn't look away.. yes it was triggering. I stomped around my house, chakn smoked. I sas angry disgusted sorry feeling nausea. 100 feelings hitting me at once (I struggle with 1feeling).
What could I do. Within 15 minutes I signed a petition. In the morning I signed another two.
Thefd is a lot with the catholic Church & institutions & now the NT boys.
Would it hurt to turn thd radio or tv down when thoss trigger stories are on. Leave thd room & then come back and listen to the sports section. The main thing is you don't want ykut mental health to suffer.
What can you do to distract your self when they are on.
a quick walk around the block - if you have a dog - she'll love it.
walk into a different room. Read the paper. If you think thd next page has a trigger, turn over that page. Distract yourself.
Instead of talkback radko, put on a music station you like. Face in the sun. Listening fo the birds.
Unfortunately it looks like thesd triggers will be around for a while. Would it hurt to miss a week of it. It's like 'The Bold And The Beautiful'. You can miss a week - and not miss a thing.
I hope you find a way of coping through this.

[Former-Member]

Hi @Former-Member, I've been wondering how you are, if you're OK, good to see you. I get triggered by the media stuff too, especially the iRCSA royal commission. This has caused a lot of us pain, across the nation, and lives have been lost because of it. So, you're far from alone.

As for strategies, I'm one for turning it off. Only yesterday on the radio they were describing new allegations re C Pell. Makes me physically sick / nauseated / and angry. Its just all too late. How do these sickos get to live so long? Only obe of my 4 childhood abusers has died. Its the only way to rid society of its poison.

AnywAy. I have to stop my mind going there, turn it off and distract myself, separate myself from it, turn the crap off and bring myself back to current time reality, putting hand to task and congratulate myself for choosing higher ground. I may not have anyone that notices & encourages me in this but I've come to realise I'm connected to everything and the good I do ripples gently into the universe, starting with life in and around me, and the universe smiles. Guess what I'm saying is we don't have to 'cope' with it - its OK to separate from it, create higher ground for yourself xox

[Appleblossom]

Hi @Former-Member I was thinking of you earlier this evening around dusk. I was out walking and the rich dark blue sky was the back drop of the stark branches of elms .. at least I think they were elms. .. it reminded of your profile pic.

About your question. I only watch a couple of hours of TV per week if that. Dont have high opinion of it.

I also did a lot of online personal research into the documents and submissions by various oranisations. When I presented to the Victorian enquiry.

Apparently I wont get my private session for the RC for another year ... and it has been changed not be about dad but to be about me.

At first years ago I found it interesting and validating to see media reports ... but since I read at the first enquiry (2years ago) I havent been particularly interested in muchraking journalism .. I did my thorough research ... and am mostly trying to focus productive activity for me and my son.

Not sure what the best approach is ... as I know at first hand ... from being present at court and events that many people are coming forward and that it is important that it be addressed properly.

Re G Pell ... I never liked him from the moment I first set eyes on him (25 years ago) before I even had my documentation through .. yet I also would not be alive if the nuns had not cared for me .. and TBH most Australians have been pretty rotten to me ... so to have an occasional kind and philosophical conversation with a priest helped me keep going .. cant say as much for the laity though. I think it is all a huge tragedy ... and not just a personal and family one .. a social one.

If you are not up for it ... dont turn on the box ... but considering the horror of a life that I have survived ... having it just on the box .. it is easy to control with the flick of a switch ... it was much harder for me trying to calm down my out of control brother for 15 years. Yet i loved him.

Sorry but it is time the world got to hear about it and the gravity and extent of the consequences CSA.

Weirdly for me .. I am finally, as of 3 months ago, able to say I was victim too .. according to NSW Dept of Justice, usually I was the coper, the one who had it together.

A few years ago it was important for my son to see it on the TV as it wasnt just his crazy mother's story ... our 3 premature deaths had social context.  Yet now we both just turn it off .. seen enough ..

[Neb]

I was shocked and sickened by that NT thing. But not so long ago a lot of MI nurses were more like custodial prison wardens .....I hope that has changed. Then again, when I was training we went out with the police as group dates. These guys were PROUD that they could beat up someone without marking them.

I find a lot of triggers too in media. When I first came to NZ to live, it seemed that NZ national sport was child abuse......the media is very much into sensationalism, and almost always report inaccurately if not downright lying. News has become entertainment  and scare monger ing. 

The world is full of horror and injustice,  but it is full of beauty and compassion as well. I think as we heal, we also find a balance.

[Mosaic]

Hi @Former-Member this is an important issue and one certainly worth discussion. I know many members can relate to feeling triggered by the media (especially the Royal Commission coverage going on at the moment). 

@utopia @Former-Member @Appleblossom and @Neb great contributions.

Personally I actively avoid reading/watching/hearing/seeing the news or being exposed to advertising in general. I am bewildered by the unncessary level of detail media outlets include in news stories day after day. For me, I choose to watch TV shows through online streaming services like netflix. I can justify the $12ish per month to avoid all the news and advertising. When the TV is on and it goes to a commercial break, I usually hit mute button and get up from my chair to make a cup of tea or fold some laundry etc. I don't need to see or hear all of that.

Now of course this does make me fairly ignorant to news and current events, but as they say, ignorance is bliss 🙂 I don't believe I need to hear about every single car accident, burglary or political argument. If something really significant happens (e.g., a major terrorist attack) I will typically look it up online to inform myself, but I choose not to camp out reading article after article. This is just something I do to protect myself, as I hear so much sad stuff every day in my line of work. 

One website I like to read is The Good News Network - they only publish positive and uplifting news stories from around the globe. They have interesting and intelligent articles (not just those feel-good fluffy rabbit stories). It's nice to remind ourselves that GOOD and AMAZING THINGS do happen every day... we just don't always get to hear about it 🙂

[Binyini]

Thank you for sharing the good news story website, it is the first time i've seen it, it is uplifting ... thank you

[1731LC]

I can relate to these issues. <br>I have two family members that went through these same things as children.<br>The same perpetrator close extented family member.<br>I could radicate him.<br>Slowly.<br>One loved one suicided because of what happen to them.<br>This Scum is still alive.<br>My own father &amp; uncle did the same to me as a child.<br>Keep posative.<br>It sounds like you have thought through the strategies that you find are helping you.<br>Sending hugs🌈